PaveParker of the Week! Y417XGB

JUST AMAZING. WE'RE STUNNED. FAN-PARKING-TASTIC!

This weeks deserved winner of our PaveParker of the Week award is the driver of Aberdeen Car Ford Focus Estate 1.6 LX reg. Y417XGB who has pioneered a brand new technique for parking on the streets and pavements of Aberdeen:

Yes, here we see on Aberdeen's Pitstruan Place the latest innovation in Aberdeen PaveParking: ChevronPaveParking!


The space available not being quite big enough for the driver or this Aberdeen Car (which is a sensible estate car), he or she has chosen to go in "on the slant", and so, instead of the usual two wheels on the pavement both belonging to either the onside or offside of the car, has planted both REAR WHEELS fully on the footway. Innovative!


Note also that by using this parking tactic, this sensible driver has made sure not to impinge on the part of the carriageway used for traffic flow (the source of all economic activity), thus demonstrating his or her commitment to sustainable economic growth. Additionally, by blocking off a good bit of the pavement, this driver is demonstrating that walking is frowned upon in this affluent area of town, despite the supposed rise in the number of people walking in Aberdeen.

The truth these pedestrian advocates avoid recognising is that most people aspire to the convenience of personal motor transport, pay dearly for the privilege, provide much employment, contribute greatly in taxes, and then people like them expect we motorists to ‘just leave the car at home once in a while’, while our money is spent creating pedestrian crossings, refuges, pavements and the like all for them freeloading walkers, who then don’t use them, much preferring to just come out of nowhere and step in front of our nice cars, thus endangering our no-claims bonuses.

And so, by the driver of this Aberdeen Car making this innovative use of the pavement for rear wheels evident by this exemplary anti-pedestrian action, we expect this new ChevronPaveParking meme to spread like wildfire through Aberdeen's stately residential avenues where economic growth and a much needed house-price uplift is the priority.

A New Strategy - Chevron PaveParking!

We are delighted to report a new development. The ingenuity of the drivers of Aberdeen Cars never ceases to amaze! And delight!


Here we see thirteen (13) Aberdeen Cars (and Vans) PaveParked "chevron style" on the footway of Aberdeen's historic St Peter's Street. To the right of the photo (out of shot) are some student halls of residence, so the cars definitely don't belong to them.

So, who do the cars belong to? Well, that building to the left is the deceptively modest global headquarters of public transport leviathan First Group - Aberdeen's gift to the world (of which we are ashamed). Regular readers will not be surprised that we don't approve of public transport, but First Group is a worldbeater and a major contributer to economic growth in Aberdeen "City and Shire", so we're a bit conflicted.

But in any case First Group - the world's largest public transport operator, what with it's revenues of £6 billion and its 130,000 staff - has been good to it's employees, a fair number of which were council workers from the rump of Grampian Regional Transport - these people struck it rich with share options and the like as the once publicly owned business was spun off and floated on the London Stock Exchange.

Yes indeed, First Group was good to it's employees - none of whom would be seen dead riding on a bus these days!