PaveParker of the Week is WVM KS11FVX

Yahay! Congratulations to this week's high-vis clad White Van Man Paveparker of the Week who we spotted demonstrating Full PaveParking outside the newish IQ office building on Aberdeen's "Historic" Jusice Mill Lane. As shown in the photo, the driver attempted to engage with us about the award, but we ignored him, in order to maintain our lofty impartiality when considering the award.

The IQ office complex has a generous loading bay and underground car-park, but - as the WMV demonstrates as he mounts all 4 wheels of his van reg KS11FVX onto the pavement - clearly not generous enough! Special mention is given to this driver for flashing the 'hazards' 'exempts' while on the pavement. We admire this belts-and-braces approach, though we considered docking PaveParking points because he hasn't "flipped the wingmirrors".

PaveParker of the Week, SV59VZN

It's great to see that the drivers of Aberdeen Cars are prepared to fight back against the many threats to PaveParking which we reported on on Monday. That's why we were gratified to see this splendid best-practice display of Full PaveParking on Aberdeen's Broomhill Road.

Yes indeed the driver of this Aberdeen Car, a lovely white Vauxhall Corsa reg SV59VZN is fighting back against the so-called politically correct brigade by parking fully on the pavement outside 165 Broomhill Road. This marginalises pedestrians and serve them right too. What do they think they're doing anyway, walking about on Broomhill Road? There's a school nearby, so seeing adults walking about is definitely suspicious. Isn't it? All the more reason to take any measure necessary to prove to these weirdos that they're just not wanted here.

So congratulations to the driver of Aberdeen Car reg. SV59VZN, you are this week's PaveParker of the Week for services to the eradication of pedestrians from the streets of Aberdeen "City and Shire".

PaveParker of the Week! Wannabe WVM in B&Q hire van BJ11FVN

It's been a few weeks, but at last the PaveParker of the Week is back! And, what's more, it's back in one of the "City and Shire's" favoured paveparking spots - Aberdeen's "historic" Holburn Street, just below the new-ish bridge on the Old Deeside Line former railway track path.

Yes, this week's PaveParker is a wannabe WVM. You see, it's not really his or her white van, it's on hourly hire from B&Q. But, this confers an advantage, for this wannabe WVM is not only demonstrating the gentle art of FULL PaveParking, but is also showing the advanced skill of PaveParkVertising too. Brilliant.

Also worthy of note is the fact that this clever PaveParker wannabe WVM has crossed the cycle lane, crossed the double-yellows and used the dropped kerb of the pedestrian refuge crossing to enable the PaveParking maneuver. Graduation to full WVM status cannot be far off!

PaveParker of the Week! PaveDriver and Bollard-Thwarter WVM TN07RNS

There used to be a TV ad for the Ford Tansit van: "Backbone of Britain" was the tag-line. The ad's not been on for a few years now - but we were heartened to see that WVM is keeping up the "Backbone of Britain" tradition on Aberdeen's Holburn Street. That's where we spotted this week's PaveParker of the Week - the White Van Man driver of Ford Transit TN07RNS gets this weeks award for teaching the layabout underemployed pestestrians (or "odd footpeople", as we now like to call them) a damned fine lesson.


Extra credit is due to our WVM PaveParker for also demonstrating a bit of PaveDriving and a hint of Bollard-Thwarting, all the while extending the empire of the motorised into the impoverished hinterland of the odd footpeople. Let's wipem out! Yeah! Now that the count-down's under way to the start of work on our exciting thrilling new orbital motorway, let's be sure and have no-one walking the streets of "The Granite City" when it opens to traffic in 2012, 2015, 2019, 2025.

PaveParkers of the Week Special! Woodlands at Pitfodels.

For the second time this summer, the first time being back in early July, we have been spoiled for choice when it came to our weekly PaveParker award - and so, once again, the award goes to all the residents in a geographical location. That location is Woodlands "at Pitfodels". Let's have a quick run-through...

This 3-litre engined Toyota Landcruiser reg. 2MLS
is also a "PaveCruiser"!

VW Golf reg. SL54YOR
has used the traffic-calming raised table
to facilitate the Full PaveParking maneuver.
Advanced!

Hyundai Estate V6 CDX "Santa Fe" (oooooh!) reg. EK56TWX
has managed to snuggle in just by the bins.

And we're delighted to report that the next generation is in good hands.
The learner driver of this BMW X6 "xDrive30d Step Auto" (oooooooh!!)
has been taught not only to use the raised table to facilitate the Full PaveParking
maneuver, but also has been taught to 'flip the wingmirrors'.
Brilliant!

Queens Road Full PaveParking Bonanza! R15TNM, SV56NEF & A15JJG

Following our PaveParking special feature last month when we featured the range of strageties and tactics employed by the parkers of Aberdeen Cars on the city's prestigious, upscale west-end avenue - Queen's Road - "Royal Boulevard of the North", we're delighted to report that our PaveParking challenge meme has been spreading like wildfire along this most salubrious of streets, where we're now delighted to report that Full PaveParking is the order of the day!

In the following photo-essay, we see three drivers of Aberdeen Cars (and Vans!) employ Full PaveParking, thus ensuring that only the right kind of people use this thoroughfare. Pedestrians only make the place look, em, poor. We say they should be stamped out and congratulate the Full PaveParkers of Queen's Road for striking the first blow in wiping out what we will now call the "odd footpeople".

R15TNM

SV56NEF

A15JJG